Finding Myself Through Community
This week I got to meet a couple of my Instagram mama friends in real life, and it inspired me to write a post on finding myself through the motherhood community.
As a woman and mother, something that I’m really passionate about is community.
Being a SAHM
I was a SAHM until my son was two, and I definitely lost myself during that time. I started an Instagram page for my son to just post photos of him in his outfits. Little did I know it was going to help me get out of my funk. The best thing that came out of that page was the huge community of moms I found who were just like me. We all let our role of being a mother consume us, so these pages were our creative outlets and our way to connect with other women. I met local moms, formed friendships and got our children together for play dates. When my son was younger, I didn’t really have any friends with kids so it was so nice finding women who could relate with all of the things I was dealing with at the time.
Going Back to Work
When my son was two, I went back to work. It was too difficult keeping up with his page, and it’s already hard getting a two-year-old to cooperate for photos as it is. Shortly after that, I decided to step outside of my comfort zone and focus on growing my own Instagram account (mind you, I had 300 followers at the time). I found a group of moms who were doing the same thing, and we bounced ideas off of each other, rooted for each other and celebrated each others small victories along the way.
Finding My Tribe
It has been so amazing watching all of those women grow-not just their following, but in who they are as women. I was so busy focusing on numbers, that I didn’t even realize that what we were building was a community. We watch each others children grow up right before our eyes, encourage each other, vent to each other, and comfort each other in times of loss. When something good happens to one of my mom friends, it truly makes me so happy. At times I’ll post about something I’m struggling with, and they make me feel like I’m not alone. We remind each other how beautiful and special each of us is, because we know how easy it is to forget. We message each other late at night about problems we’re dealing with, or for advice on why our kids aren’t sleeping.
Most of us have never met in person, and some of us even live in different countries. There is something so unique about being a mother, that it instantly bonded us no matter how different or far apart we might be. Finding a community of such empowering women has inspired and motivated me in ways I never expected. It’s the best feeling connecting with other moms and sharing experiences with breast feeding, potty training, sleep deprivation, balancing our marriages after kids or insane toddler tantrums.
I wrote a post recently about Why I’m so Over Mom Guilt, and I think a big part of the reason I’m over feeling guilty is that I now realize that I’m not alone. Having a supportive community of moms has uplifted me, and made me realize that I’m doing the best that I can and that’s enough.
Making Mom Friends
Let’s be real, it’s not easy making friends as an adult and it’s even harder as a mom. Since it would probably be creepy to go up to a mom at Target and ask her if she wants to be my friend, I’m so grateful for the friends I’ve made through Instagram. I recently had a mom’s night out with Tori (themanifestingmama), and Ania (kuklaania). We went out on a Monday, took an Uber, drank way more than we usually would, laughed, bonded over stories about our kids and took like 3,000 photos. Needless to say it was SO much fun, and exactly what I needed. I’m so grateful for the amazing moms I’ve met through social media who have turned into real friends.
It doesn’t matter what phase of life you’re in, it makes such a huge difference when you find your community.
39 Comments
Lori N.
Love this post and it gave me some great ideas. Need to somehow share with other IG and bloggers in my area.
admin
Thanks so much! Yess social media makes it so much easier to connect with people and find your tribe!
Emily | Lil Mama Bear Blog
I know what you mean. It makes a big difference to have a network of supportive mamas. It really does take a village!
Amir
Awe I LOVE this post!!! You are so right it is challenging finding making friends as an adult and especially friends who can relate to what you are going through. I’m new to mommy crew but I hope to connect with others in my area through my blog. Your tribe seems awesome!!!! 🙂
admin
Thank you so much!! It definitely can be challenging. It makes such a huge difference having a group of women you can connect with! Let me know if you ever want to chat! They’re amazing! 🙂
Tori Block
I loved reading this Safi! Your perspective is beautiful, and everything you wrote is so true. We find so much solace within our little community!
admin
Thank you so much babe! I’m so glad we met through this community!
Mariah
I feel like I am starting to find who I am again. I think I got lost in the role of mom and house wife that I forgot who I was.
Stephanie
Totally agree with this post. Having a tribe/great community I think is paramount to success and definitely happiness. Keep killing it!
admin
Yess I couldn’t agree more! I wish I discovered how powerful it is sooner! Thanks babe!
Mrs G
i totally resonate with this post. our family moves around a lot and one of the benefits of blogging is being able to connect with like minded mamas, i love it!
Mrs G
i totally resonate with this post. our family moves around a lot and one of the benefits of blogging is being able to connect with like minded mamas, i love it! mrs g
admin
I’m so glad you can relate!! Yess it is so helpful having a community of mamas you can connect with!!
Ania K
Loved reading this, Safi! Your beautiful words ring so true and put things in a whole new perspective. Thank you for sharing! Can’t wait to have another fun night out!
admin
Aww thank you babe!! Me neither!! Weekend getaway next time!
Celeste
I love connecting with people through social media! I’ve struggled a lot making friends and new connections since we moved.
admin
Me too! It’s definitely hard finding friends when you get older so social media helps with that!
Karis | Don't Dream, Just Travel
That’s amazing that you were able to make so many good friends over social media! It goes to show that Instagram really can connect the world!
admin
Yes it’s such an amazing way to connect with people all over the world!
Victoria
Tribes are so important
admin
they totally are!
Dana
Who we have around us is so important! I’m so glad you have a supportive community!!
admin
Yes it totally is!! Me too!
Kat
I love this! It’s so important to have the support of as many people as possible! I love reaching out to the various mom’s groups I’m a part of. Once I move I’m hoping to make some mom friends that I can actually see and hang out with too.
Cindy
Love that you posted this. I a presently looking for my tribe of mom friends who can be there for me. I became a SAHM when my son was about 1 1/2 years old. During that time I lost myself and became pregnant with baby number two and the women in my life didn’t help uplift me I felt like they were against me and that made being a new mom worse. I still can’t talk about it without getting upset but I am trying eliminate that out of my life and find like minded women and want to see me be a great mom. This post shows me there is hope. THANKS!!
admin
Thanks babe! It’s definitely important to have a supportive group of friends! Feel free to DM me if you ever want to chat! 🙂
admin
Hi Cindy! I can definitely relate to that! It took me a while to find a good group of mom friends since most of my friends don’t have kids yet. Being a new mom can be so hard, I’m always here if you want to chat!
Riva Treasure
I think meeting other bloggers in the area is so fun and I agree with everything you said! Glad you got to get out and have a fun girls day!
admin
Yess it’s the best! Thank you I’m glad I did too!
Susie Whittenberger
I don’t know what I would do without my mom friends! I don’t have any family around, so they are my literal “emergency contacts”!
admin
Mom friends are seriously life savers! That’s amazing that yours have become your family!
Pazao
You are so inspiring, I’m not a mom (yet) but this is definitely to consider for future use!
admin
Aww thank you so much that’s so sweet!
Kim
Loved reading this post! I left my job to blog full time recently and it has been a major adjustment not having coworkers to interact with every day. Anytime I feel myself getting a little stir crazy, I text up friends to have lunch or coffee. It’s so necessary for my sanity!
admin
Thanks babe! That’s a huge leap! Congrats! I can imagine that it would get lonely! That’s great that you have local friends you can get together with!
Lydia D'Antonio
It really is such a challenge to make friends when your older! I can relate and I love this post!! Thanks for sharing!
Xo http://www.lydialouise.com/how-wear-white-denim/
admin
It totally is! I’m so glad you liked it! 🙂
Briana
It’s always great to have a support group behind you!
Briana
https://beyoutifulbrunette.com/
admin
Yes! I couldn’t agree more!